Dear 10 Year Old Me

I saw somewhere, I can't remember where, someone suggest writing a letter to 10 year old you.  So I thought about this.  What would I say to 10 year old me?  I thought about warning 10 year old me about things that would happen, or things to do or not do, or tell 10 year old me about great things that will happen, or things to not worry about, etc.  This is what I ended up writing to 10 year old me-

Dear 10 year old me,

I could write you and tell you all these things about your future.  Things that will happen, things about who you are and who you become.  Things to do and things not to do.  Things you don’t need to worry about.  But all of the things you will go through will help to shape you into who you become, and you will be happy with who you become.  It won’t be easy to get there, there will be pain and you will make mistakes, but without them, you wouldn’t become me.  So all I will tell you is to look for the beauty.  Look for the beauty in the world, the beauty in the small things, the beauty in the pain.  Don’t run or hide from the pain and the hard times, just remember to look for the beauty in them.

Love,

27 year old me

I Love...

I started this list in 2004 I think and have been adding to it a bit since that time.  What do you love?

I love the feeling of walking barefoot in sand. 
I love the sound of a tennis ball and racquet connecting on a perfect swing. 
I love animals, especially dogs, and even cats, although I say I don’t. 
I love walking in the woods and climbing mountains. 
I love sunsets. I love watching them and taking pictures of them. And I’d probably love sunrises too if I even slightly enjoyed mornings and ever woke up to see one. 
I love when someone is so excited about something, they make me excited too, even if I didn’t originally care at all about what they’re excited about. 
I love to be tickled. Not the annoying poking kind, but the nice, soft, relaxing kind. 
I love pop rocks. Especially when I get one so big it kind of hurts when it pops. 
I love music and I love to sing and dance (alone), even though I’m not good and don’t know much about it. 
I love hugs. 
I love the way my mouth feels right after I brush my teeth. 
I love watching little kids. And I love playing little games with them when their parents aren’t watching.
I love those moments in life when I feel deep joy and peace. 
I love laughing so hard that I cry. 
I love those moments when I am talking with someone and one of us says “oh my gosh, me too!” 
I love the smell of pine trees and the way they whisper when the wind blows through them. 
I love summer thunder storms- the sights, sounds & smells of them and the tense excited feeling I get when they come. 
I love getting notes and messages from people for no reason other than for them to say “I love you.” 
I love crunching leaves under my feet in the fall and I will go out of my way to step on an extra-crunchy-looking leaf. 
I love finding a new song that I love so much that I basically have it on repeat for about 2 weeks straight. 
I love people watching. 
I love looking up into the night sky when there are big fluffy white snowflakes falling down.
I love the time of day I call The Golden Hour. When the sun is setting and the world looks as though it is glowing.
I love getting so absorbed into a good foreign movie that I eventually don’t even realize I am reading subtitles.

We Live Here Together

I live in a low-income housing apartment.  I have heard comments made about expectations of what people assume my neighbors to be, but I have never had a bad experience.  Everyone says hello to me.  One time I held the door for a woman taking her dogs out.  We exchanged a pleasant greeting and when I got up to my apartment I realized I had left my keys in the entrance door when I opened it for her.  I ran back downstairs and the woman was waiting in the lobby for me with my keys.  The other day I had my hands full of groceries and a woman walking by pushed the elevator button for me to help me out.  Small simple things that say "we live here together."

Take a Seat - Make a Friend?

I usually share my own stories.  But I must share my newest favorite video!  This is definitely "the little things are the big things"!

Cab Driver

I love cab drivers.  Mostly because usually they are from foreign countries and I can often talk about Africa with them or use some of the Arabic I know:).  Last night that wasn't the case, but it was my favorite cab driver I've had so far.

He was an older (older being relative, not old-old, but older to me) soft-spoken African American man.  We talked about his cats and my dog and some small chat, but then he started telling me about his art.  He can draw anything and does graphic design and airbrush art but his passion is designing clothes.  He started designing clothes in 10th grade.  He used to draw so much his friends told him he was going to go crazy.  He had some of his design sketches with him and let me look at them.  He says they are a futuristic style.  I told him some of them looked like something Michael Jackson would have worn.  He said he designed some for Michael and always dreamed of meeting him and being able to show them to him. He told me that he has dreams where his design ideas come to him.  Sometimes a dream of a whole fashion show of new ideas.  So now he keeps a notebook by his bed so he can sketch them before he forgets them.

We talked about how I always wanted to be a children's author and how before I could write I would tell my grandma stories and she would write them down for me and I would draw the pictures.  He told me he always pushed his daughter to write stories too and that she loved it like I did.

He was sweet and exuded a gentleness about him.  I loved hearing about his passion and was honored that he shared some of it with me.  He got a good tip :)

Dancing Fairy

I just saw a fairy dancing in the tree outside my balcony. Upon focusing, what was it "actually?" The setting sun reflecting off a strand of spiderweb that would generally go unnoticed. But really, maybe these are one in the same.

Lilith Fair

I should have written about this a long time ago but I forgot.  I recently heard Family Affair by Mary J. Blige and everytime I do I am reminded of this "little big thing" moment.

When Lilith Fair first became popular I was too young to go by myself and didn't have anyone who would take me.  I dreamed of going though and have loved many of the musicians that were involved in it forever.  Last summer (or was it the one before?) when they brought Lilith Fair back I was FINALLY able to fulfill my dream of going.

Sitting in my seat for the main stage acts I looked around.  Certain "groups" of people were clear.  A whole row consisted of a family in jeans, cowboys hats, and Miranda Lambert t-shirts.  It was clear these country-lovin' folks came specifically to see Ms. Lambert and did not show up until the main stage acts went on because they did not care about the others.  Then there were groups of African Americans that were clearly specifically there to see Mary J. Blige and did not show up until the main stage acts went on because they too did not care about the others.  Then there was the "typical" Lilith Fair crowd that had been there all day and probably cared the least about Miranda & Mary's acts.

But something awesome happened.  When Mary J. Blige sang Family Affair EVERYONE danced and sang along.  The cowboy hat wearing clan in front of me were moving just the same as the groups of African Americans (although with a bit less rhythm) and so was the "typical" crowd.  I don't know if anyone else noticed it or if they were just paying attention to what the moment was doing for them, but I noticed it.  I looked around and saw how music brought so many different people together.  How despite the differences, this one song and moment brought shared smiles and movement to EVERYONE there.